Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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