is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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