her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
