so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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