a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
operation harelip BJ is a go
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
