Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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