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Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
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