I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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