Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
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Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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