dude i'm inner monologue high
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
