love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
