You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
