You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize