um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
