TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
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