What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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