5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
soo... how was my night?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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