it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
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