sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
