Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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