How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
