I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
