I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
