Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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