i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
