I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
