He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
