I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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