I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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