operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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