Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Randomize
