I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize