Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
