Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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