grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
