i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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