i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize