Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I think i got beer on your cat.
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