No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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