im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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