If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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