Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
