lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
