More tranny stories later!
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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