Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo

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(708): View more from Illinois

Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.

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He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?

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(307): View more from Wyoming

Did I show you my penis last night?

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(315): View more from New York

I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.

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(928): View more from Arizona

Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture

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(434): View more from Virginia

I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha

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(415): View more from California

Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."

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