Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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