Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I am available for nakedness
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.