I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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