I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize