I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
