We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
