so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Randomize
